Experiencing the grief and loss of an old version of ourselves, and our overall sense of safety of having someone in our life, it's as if we were traveling alone on foot in the middle of the night, unprotected, and unable to see where we are.
It’s easy to feel invincible to the elements when we have a loving partner, friend, or family member to take shelter with and lean on. It’s another story to learn how to stand on our own again when we no longer have that safety and protection of their company. I say this because I'm currently going through the heartache of letting go of my partner, one I could have spent the rest of my life with, and learning how to move forward with more wisdom and my own strength again.
The path to healing is a tricky one. Having traveling down this road a few times, I've learned that if one is not careful, we can find ourselves going in circles, coming back to familiar patterns, places, and people, and wondering what went wrong, what we or they did, and why we're reliving the past in some form or another (either in work, relationships, friendships, family, etc.). Questions I'm often asking after these experiences are:
- How does one break the cycle for good?
- How do I transform the trauma, triggers, and pains into discernment, self-awareness, and compassion?
- How do I forgive myself and/or them, and find joy again?
I don't have a clear answer yet. There are many different ways we're told on how to get there, and no final destination in sight. We can have an idea of where our choices may lead us, but usually we won't know if it was right for us until long after it's been made. The decisions I've made based on fear and wanting to please others have led me to many pains, and so have the choices I've made with love and the best intentions of my heart. There is always a risk of getting hurt. That's life just life-ing for you.
What I'm coming to learn is not to avoid the unavoidable risks, but to choose the choices where inner love and respect has a better chance to thrive on, despite the unpredicatable circumstances I might face along the way. I'm nowhere near perfect at this process, but looking back at where I've been, I can see how far I've come. Part of it is from never wanting to experience my mistakes again, as well as recognizing the universal connection between all living things: how my own actions and emotions affect me and how in turn they impact others.
To truly love and care for someone is because I know how to deeply love and care for myself. Understanding how to gently hold another person's heart as mindfully as I do with mine. Having that be reciprocated. We unearth the peace and solace we seek when we take the time to rebuild our past into a stronger sense of self, knowing our true selves better. As I adventure through this self-healing journey -
May I trust in the direction of my intuitive heart as it guides me through the unknowns of life, as I continue to grow and experience more love, hope, and gratitude than I could imagine.
May my pains be transformed into messages of wisdom, grace, and inner beauty, and intertwined into the jewelry pieces I create with my own two hands.
May you feel my heart when you wear your Dakatta jewelry piece, and through our shared connection, let it remind us together, to shine our inner lights, to show up for ourselves better than we did yesterday, and move about the world with more courage, authenticity, and love in our footsteps, even when it doesn’t feel easy. We'll find our way through.
With all my love,